Assaultive Men's Group More Charges middle of the night on June 25 Called for Continued from Page 1 he was beaten with a baseball bat and stabbed with a butcher knife in his home by men calling him "a faggot." Reading the Warning Signals by Prashant Ziskind spouse. but I could trust the Cassidy's sister has called Cassidy says different men Two weeks ago we ran an inter- guys. I now feel I know these for the arrest of six other men returned July 26. view with one of the first guys better than the guys they she believes are part of a gang of A friend of Cassidy's who graduates of Nelson's Assaul- work with. intimidators in the Slocan Val- was on the phone with him at the tive Men's Group, run by Nel- "A lot of things that I would ley. time of the last attack heard son Community Services deny at home, I would admit in "They cannot be allowed to someone say, 'Shut up and sit Centre. This week, another group. Acting defensively was further disturb, offend or assault down.' "Then when I heard graduate shares his experience. my biggest hurdle. Now I have the public," says Linda Carter. Michael scream I hung up and Tom is not his real name. the ability to read my warning "With the psychological and called the police," said the friend Tom had a very different signals and to act on them. physical trauma that my brother who asked to not be identified. background from Lou's. "I came There's a period that _leads up to has experienced, he would not Nelson RCMP say plain from a dysfunctional but not a violence: it might be raising a feel secure upon release from clothesmen and uniformed violent home. My parents didn't voice, threatening, name calling, hospital." members from Nelson are help- fight. So I didn't know how to intimidating posture or gestures. Cassidy moved to Lemon ing the New Denver detachment disagree in a healthy way. I had Violence doesn't come out of Creek two months ago. In the investigate the assaults. no role model." nowhere. You read the signals After an incident where and take responsibility for acting Tom hit his wife, he became on them." alarmed and called the the Com- Tom feels strongly about the munity Services Centre for help. issue of responsibility for vio- "I wanted to see a counselor," lence. "I'm all in favor of throw- recalls Tom. "I knew I had a reel and fair. As they came to ing guys in jail for this crime. problem and whether my mar- my awareness, it was an eye The violent spouse has to take riage survived or not, I wanted opener. It felt good to see that. responsibility for what he's to deal with it. It felt like a relief." done. "In my mind the problem Tom says the confidentiality "Each one in the group had was only the violence. I came to and trust of the group were key a different background. All the see the violence was only a tiny to its success. "I wouldn't have guys that volunteered made If you are a school dropout... symptom. I had subtle ways of participated if I'd felt judged. good progress. Some of the manipulating that were not cor- It's a big hurdle to admit I hit my court-ordered men were not ... and have been out of school for some time ready but even they benefited. I (minimum of one year), but want to continue your would recommend this group for education in an alternat ive setting, School District #7 guys who want to heal themsel- (Nelson) may be able to help you. A program is being An Oasis of Delicious Meals ves, but that's up to them. " considered for September 1991 that wourd enable and Friendly Service. Tom's wife was in the bat- dropout students to work toward graduation in a setting Open all w«k 5:30pm tered women's group. "I thought apart from a regular school. Sunday Brunch In the garden it was very helpful. My going to If you are interested please phone Debbie or Tracy at 10:30am-1pm my group helped me, which 352- 6681 for registration details. (Reseniations Recommended) helped my marriage. Her going Note: Students currently registered in a public school ~ , . . .~. . . . . . ., 8254466 to her group helped her. My wife and I were really committed 11 are not eligible for the to each other." Outreach Program. Tom's advice to other men such as himself: "Don't be em- SCHOOL DISTRICT #7, NELSON barrassed and ashamed. Correct yourself before it gets serious." WESTSIDE CRAGMONT WHOLE HAMS CANTALOUPE SOFT DRINKS (~ Whole, Large Size, #1 Grade 2 litre Assorted Flavours Un-cut, Ready to Eat SAFEWAY i¼ ming it all t.ogethi!r+ 88¢EA 98¢~ GREAT SPECIALS TO BE HAD California Price Plus Limit 1 with Grown Deposit Family Purchase THIS WEEK! HEAD LETTUCE LUCERNE YOGURT OVENJOY BREAD #i~f B.C. Grown #1 Grade Regular or Diet, 175g White or 60% Whole Wheat ,,,.,,,,,,,,;/~ ' .~ 1,,-,.,._ y Ar,,,,.. _.,,?-:~ •· -.:,,- 39¢EA 5/ 2.00 88¢ •_!'______ ,,_,... ~ '---... Garden Fresh Selected Varieties + 570g Loaf Sale Prices in effect Thru August 10 Mon. Tues. Wed: 9 - 6, Thurs. Fri: 9 - 9, Sat: 9 - 6, Sun: 10 - 5. 211 ANDERSON ST., NELSON Page 2 THE KOOTENAY WEEKLY EXPRESS A'!g_ust 7, 1991